What is an example of something true that nobody generally wants to admit?

“Success is procured from sabotaging someone else’s happiness.”

Getting a job for you means no job for someone else, getting a Top tier college seat for you leaves many of your own friends jealous and unhappy. Robots’ invention left common laborers jobless. Success of Flipkart, Amazon, Walmart, and Reliance took away the ownership of countless small scale businessmen.

inessential – Social Media Mobs

Source: http://inessential.com/2018/08/30/social_media_mobs

  • “It felt like a mob. The mob wasn’t in any way self-aware or coordinated — but it still felt like a single driven thing.”
  • “it was over my own software and a mistake”
  • “The mob never apologized. Mobs never do.”
  • “For a long time after everyone forgot.”
  • “So I’m thinking about whether or not to stay.”

Comment: https://wanqu.co/a/6912/social-media-mobs/

2009年,作者因为自己写的软件里有一两个错误而在 Twitter 上招到网络暴力,他甚至考虑推出科技圈,不编程了。网络暴徒们其实不会持久地喷你,他们很快会有新的攻击对象,很快会忘掉你的。

只要你有一定的关注度,比如你的微博账号开始有几千个粉丝了,必然要招到别人毫无理由的辱骂。有人喜欢你,肯定有人讨厌你。这是一个 package,好的坏的都得一起接受。别问我是怎么知道的:)经验之谈啊~

Logged off: meet the teens who refuse to use social media

Source: https://www.theguardian.com/society/2018/aug/29/teens-desert-social-media

  • a backlash among young people has been quietly boiling.
  • “You start doing things that are dishonest”
  • weary of the pressures of sustaining an online persona
  • It became depressing. It was this competition of who’s the happiest
  • A desire to build authentic, offline friendships motivated some to quit
  • did so in order to “use time in more valuable ways”.
  • “mindless vortex of never-ending scrolling”
  • but there is a sense of privacy that is being breached as well
  • Constant screen time damages your ability to see, and it also causes internal damage, such as anxiety
  • when you do, it’s such a relief


文章一 – 树徳堂


可以说,去苏州寻找沈复芸娘的清魂一直是我内心的情结。据我所知,沈复和芸娘在苏州活动的区域很多,比如《浮生六记》里提到的沧浪亭、可园、仓米巷等,当然我们最想去的是沈复的旧居,如今是大石头巷36号的吴宅,传说那个院子里不但有沈复夫妻住过的小楼“宾香阁”,还有苏州现存最精美的砖雕门楼——“麐翔凤游”。 那天上午我们坐高铁到了苏州,好友徐黎帆老师就开车带我们直奔可园,开始我们的寻访之旅。

Continue reading “大石头巷”

Science shows that luck is a self-fulfilling prophecy

Source: https://qz.com/1360304/science-shows-that-luck-is-a-self-fulfilling-prophecy/

  • how lucky we feel influences our future fortunes.
  • luck begets luck
  • This makes optimists the luckiest people of all
  • optimists are more likely to see other people’s experiences as lucky, while pessimists focus on misfortune in the same set of facts
  • “a significant positive correlation” between subjects’ level of optimism and how lucky they thought others were.
  • judgments about luck are inconsistent and changeable, “the predictable result of framing effects and idiosyncratic personality traits.”
  • most people mistakenly believe their success is the inevitable result of hard work or personal qualities, ignoring the fact that they’ve made a lucky draw in a numbers game.
  • people who acknowledge luck as an element of their success are more attractive to others.
  • the ability to recognize fortune’s role makes for a more humble person—and humility is a more attractive quality than arrogance.
  • luck is a kind of self-fulfilling prophecy.
  • Wiseman posits that feeling unlucky creates fear and anxiety, which in turn makes us less likely to see opportunities. Lucky people are, to some degree, those who keep their eyes, minds, and hearts open, making themselves available for fortune.
  • The luckiest among us, then, are great storytellers—magical realists who can see the upside of downturns and consider how much worse things might have been.
  • People who can spin a yarn that emphasizes what went right, rather than focusing solely on what went awry, ultimately create good fortune, and thus up their chances of getting lucky again

There Is No Indispensable Man

Source: https://www.artofmanliness.com/articles/there-is-no-indispensable-man/

Sometime when you’re feeling important;
Sometime when your ego’s in bloom;
Sometime when you take it for granted,
You’re the best qualified in the room:
Sometime when you feel that your going,
Would leave an unfillable hole,
Just follow these simple instructions,
And see how they humble your soul.

Take a bucket and fill it with water,
Put your hand in it up to the wrist,
Pull it out and the hole that’s remaining,
Is a measure of how much you’ll be missed.
You can splash all you wish when you enter,
You may stir up the water galore,
But stop, and you’ll find that in no time,
It looks quite the same as before.

The moral of this quaint example,
Is to do just the best that you can,
Be proud of yourself but remember,
There’s no indispensable man.

Dwight D. Eisenhower — five-star general, Supreme Allied Commander, U.S. President — carried a copy of the same poem in his pocket. In fact, when Ike returned to Normandy for the 20th anniversary of D-Day and was asked to give a speech at a dinner commemorating the invasion, rather than use the occasion to wax poetic about his role in executing one of the most monumental military operations in history, this man of singular eminence instead used the opportunity to read — “The Indispensable Man.”

Here’s The Technique That Ambitious People Use To Get What They Want

Source: https://ryanholiday.net/heres-the-technique-that-ambitious-people-use-to-get-what-they-want/?utm_source=wanqu.co&utm_campaign=Wanqu+Daily&utm_medium=website

There is the type who expects to be asked a number of questions from management. And then there is the type who expects not only to do most of the asking, but to put on a presentation. It is the first type that sees the situation as an interview, and it is the second who sees it not as an interview, but as an audition.

in charge and detailed exactly what he was planning to do

just enough questions to establish comfort and trust, then they reveal how much research they have done prior to showing up, by explaining all the things they’ve learned about the business, how they intend to improve it and exactly why they’re the right person for the job. This move, done politely but confidently, immediately separates them from all the other potential hires.

Yet the fact is that our lives can be defined by these moments of earnest ambition.

We might regret missed opportunities here or there, but rarely do we have the self-awareness and insight to see the opportunities we missed turning into opportunities because we were too lazy, too scared, too entitled to do the work to turn them into opportunities in the first place.

I love the Briefcase Technique because, sure, it’s about confidence and about knowing your shit, but mostly it’s about being willing to actually take a swing at something. To truly put yourself out there — to try.

There are just as many stories about coaches or ambitious upstarts who were laughed out of the room or passed over for someone more qualified, more connected, more “deserving.”

But when it does work? Well, your whole life will change.

So try it.

The Power of Positive People

Source: https://www.nytimes.com/2018/07/10/well/the-power-of-positive-people.html

  • our well-being also is influenced by the company we keep
  • can influence obesity, anxiety and overall happiness
  • remarkably optimistic and upbeat
  • a renewed commitment not only to exercise and healthful living, but to simply step up my social life and spend more time hanging out with happy people.
  • The key to building a successful moai is to start with people who have similar interests, passions and values.
  • I argue that the most powerful thing you can do to add healthy years is to curate your immediate social network
  • Your group of friends are better than any drug or anti-aging supplement, and will do more for you than just about anything




沈复在沧浪亭畔生活多年。沧浪亭位于苏州古城南北主干道人民路稍南端的东侧,初为北宋诗人苏舜钦所建,现已列入世界文化遗产名录。沧浪亭北侧临水, 楼台亭阁,一座典型的江南小园林。”过石桥,进门,折东曲径而入,叠石成山,林木葱翠。亭在土山之巅。” 现状与书中描述完全吻合,但土山不高,至多只有两层楼那么高。当时的”周望极目可数里”当然已不可能。园中的”看山楼”似乎更高些。据书中”…居沧浪亭爱 莲居西间壁,板桥内一轩临流,…檐前老树一株,浓荫覆窗,…隔岸游人往来不绝…”的文字,可推测沈复的住宅应位于沧浪亭园林的西侧,即现在的人民路到沧浪 亭园林之间(现为几家商店)。因现在园内建筑中已没有名为”爱莲居”的房间,最西处是”锄月轩”和”藕花水榭”,沈复和陈芸婚后消夏之处很可能就是”锄月 轩”或旁边临河处。沧浪亭的河对面有一个小园林名”可园”,从网上资料(沧浪区志)证实其前身即为书中所述的”近山林”和”正谊书院”。

Continue reading “浮生六记中沧浪寻迹”